Not the outdoor type

What if something's on t.v. and its never shown again?*

So that's it. Summer's almost gone. Any warm weather from now on is a bonus, not an Indian summer. As far as I'm concerned, it's autumn and time to light even more candles and draw the blinds and curtains shut, delighting at the dying of the light.We have just ended the summer holidays with a week in a field. And although we had a spacious yurt to stay in, it was still in a field. This meant a four hour walk with a wheelbarrow to do some bad washing up and a full blown existential crisis while even contemplating washing of bodies.Not keen on walking to the loo in the middle of the night, which to be honest was little more than a sawdust-filled hole surrounded by a fence, I may or may not have gone really back to nature. And it was a lovely way to check on the stars, which were out of this world, even if half naked and glasses-less may have made me rush my normally contemplative astronomical gazing.But there really is something wonderful about sausage, egg and bacon eaten with your bare feet in the mid-morning dew. The warmth of the gas barbecue ring for the kettle defrosting all of us like mammoths found beneath the ice. I honestly can't remember ever having been so cold, and I've been to Newcastle.A fire each night kept us warm for a while, we toasted marshmallows. No-one but me liked them, which I don't understand. They are like really trashy creme brulées on a stick. Sort of. And obviously the heat is enough to remove fingerprints. Still, you need your kicks when sleeping in a field.When the rest of the family left me to go inside, complaining, I stared at the sky for some time, thinking big thoughts, watching the moon slowly move through the night and the three constellations I can recognise slowly appear. Then, when I could no longer feel my limbs and face, I went inside and we listened to the episodes of The Archers we managed to download in the nearby town.Food had to be simple. One night we had steaks, cooked directly on the flames (which, in a huge chest beating moment of manliness I had managed to get going by using dried corn husks as kindling thanks very much). An onion tossed fully skinned into the embers came out soft, sweet and smoky and the mushrooms, cooked quickly with sage went down very well with Noah. Maya had chopped them all for us, but refused to eat them.We stewed some rhubarb too, for pudding. Noah chopped it and loaded it into one of the big cast-iron pans. How I love them. (The pans. Quite fond of the children too I suppose). Apart from the stringy fibres, which I forgot to remove, it was delicious. I used an indecent amount of sugar, but you have to really.We made mint and sage tea while the children learned to build shelters and light fires. Noah didn't think much of it, but at least he tried it. Maya looked at me from under suspicious eyebrows and backed silently away. And I kept thinking "these are the good old days."But, there is a certain relief of a whole night spent in your own bed, once back home. Even if there are no hooting owls. And to be honest, I can do without the moos in the middle of the night too. Perhaps it was the cows getting their own backs for the steaks we had eaten.*Evan DandoThis week:Watched: Despicable Me 3. I liked it. It was ok. I didn't like it. The children did though, and to be honest, a rainy day in Norfolk needs some diversions.Read: Halfway through A Tale of Two Cities. Each page is an exercise in perseverance, but on I go...Eaten: Steaks on a fire, marshmallows, lots of crisps and shortbread, a screaming drive down to our favourite Indian restaurant the moment we arrived home...Listened to: The Beatles 1967-70 that Noah found in a record shop and Miles Davis while I drank coffee and read the New Yorker on our sofa marvelling at electricity and having a sink inside.

Burgers of Calais

Actually, this has nothing whatsoever to do with Calais, I've just always wanted to make that joke. And seeing as we're being robbed of a decent summer here in London, you've got to get the laughs where you can.Nothing quite beats a good burger, unless you're vegetarian of course. And nothing quite beats a homemade one either. You can add all kinds of spices and herbs to it to pep it up a little, or, you can keep it simple, but know exactly what's in it.I usually add some red onion compôte to my burger mix, but today I've just gone with finely chopped red onion. Added to that are some capers for a little zing, a few dried herbs (I find adding fresh ones too mimsy) and for smokiness, some paprika. Ready to cook after a little rest in the fridge to firm up and you can do this on the barbecue if you're somewhere sunny, or just on a hot griddle pan if you're in England.Maybe next year...Ingredients (per burger)150g good minced beef1tsp dried rosemary1tsp dried thyme1tsp smoked paprika1tsp capers1 tbsp chopped red onionSome beaten egg (1 between 2 burgers)1tbsp breadcrumbsPlenty of salt and pepper to seasonSome sliced red onionSome lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, mustard and ketchup and a good bun.Method:Mix all the burger ingredients together well and leave to rest for about 20 minutes in the fridge.Heat a griddle pan until smoking the. Cook the burger for about three minutes each side, longer if you prefer it well done. Cook the onion rings and toast the bun a little. I prefer sesame topped soft buns, a classic, but you may be trendy and want to use brioche... Your choice.Top a bun with lettuce, tomato and onion then add the burger, ketchup and mustard and eat with plenty of napkins.

Barbecued mushrooms

  It seems long ago now that we were on holiday on the Greek island of Paxos. Spiros and his Bar Taxidi kept spirits high as I struggled with intense hay fever from the olive trees. It was here I first had spaghetti with sea urchins; we watched a young boy dive into the  invisibly clear water and pick them from the sea bed. Eating them there on the beach was one of the greatest meals I've ever had. It was also on Paxos that we first had mushrooms cooked on a wood fire. It may seem a simple thing, and it is, but the flavour was incredible. There is always a first time and this was mine. You can add whatever herbs you fancy to this, but I'd recommend being generous with the garlic and oil. The mushrooms really soak up flavour. Watch them well. Inevitably you will lose a few through the grill, so make sure you have plenty. I'd serve these with some rosemary and lemon chicken thighs and definitely outside in the sun.Ingredients800g chestnut mushrooms, thickly sliced, some just halved if you like3-4 garlic cloves, choppedA lot of olive oil to pour over A pinch of chilli flakesA handful or thyme leaves, oregano, rosemary and parsley to finish Salt and pepper MethodMarinade the mushrooms in the other ingredients then cook on a hot barbecue, turning occasionally until turning golden.If you don't have a barbecue, or a garden, these work well on a furiously hot griddle pan.